Move over, multiverse — Robert Pattinson just broke cinema by battling, befriending, and becoming himself in the year’s most bonkers sci-fi spectacle. Mickey 17, the new film from Oscar-winning Parasite director Bong Joon-ho, isn’t just a movie. It’s a chaotic, darkly hilarious clone war starring Pattinson in eight wildly different roles… all as versions of the same space janitor. And trust us, you’ve never seen anything like it.
So What’s the Deal With All the Pattinsons?
In Mickey 17 (based on Edward Ashton’s novel Mickey7), Pattinson plays Mickey, a disposable “employee” on a doomed mission to colonize an ice-covered alien planet. Every time Mickey dies, a new clone replaces him — with most of his memories intact. But when Mickey 17 wakes up to find his previous clone (Mickey 16) still alive, chaos erupts. Cue existential crises, dark comedy, and Pattinson literally arguing with himself in scenes so uncanny, that you’ll forget it’s one actor.
“It’s Pattinson vs. Pattinson — And Everyone Wins”
Early screenings have leaked wild details: one clone becomes a rebel leader, another obsesses over strawberry ice cream, and two team up to prank their crewmates. Bong’s signature mix of social satire and jaw-dropping visuals turns what could’ve been a gimmick into a masterpiece. “Rob brought a different vibe to each clone — one’s a coward, another’s a poet, and one’s just done with everything,” a crew member spilled. “You’ll laugh, then cry, then question reality.”
Fans Are Losing It
Twitter exploded after the first trailer dropped, with clips of Pattinson clones fighting over a spacesuit or playing chess together. One fan tweeted, “PATTINSON MULTIPLIED BY BONG JOON-HO? I’ve peaked. Cancel all my plans for 2024.” Meanwhile, co-stars Steven Yeun (as a scheming pilot) and Toni Collette (the mission’s no-nonsense captain) admitted they “couldn’t keep a straight face” watching Rob bicker with himself.
Why This Isn’t Just Another Sci-Fi Flick
Bong’s genius lies in turning clone chaos into a razor-sharp critique of capitalism and identity. Each Mickey is a corporate pawn, but Pattinson gives them soul — and a killer sense of humor. The film’s wild third act, packed with ice monsters and explosive betrayals, will leave you gasping. As one critic whispered, “It’s Fight Club meets The Thing… if Edward Norton was also Brad Pitt and the couch.”
Mark Your Calendars — Or Else
Mickey 17 melts into theaters in March 2025, and early buzz calls it Pattinson’s best performance since The Batman. Whether you’re here for the sci-fi, the satire, or the sheer WTF factor of eight R-Pattzs, this is the must-see movie of the year. Pro tip: Watch the post-credits scene. Rumor has it, Mickey 18 is already causing trouble…